Comedy!

[-b|ind-]

I thought this website needed some comedy so heres some news for you:

News today-
A man shooting and killing his wife, daughter, two sons, mother, father, dog, neighbor, and the mailman, when he clams he was just cleaning his gun when it just suddenly went off.

Other news-
Man who attempted to walk around the earth drowned today.

Thats all the news for now.

I thought that was funny shish! well Sence this board seems so dead now and theres no one to cause any trouble for now i thought i would try to keep the converstations going!

[Half-White]

Originally posted by -b|ind-
Man who attempted to walk around the earth drowned today. [/B]

That was funny!:)

*Mama joke*

YOUR MAMA'S SO FAT, THAT SHE TAKES BATHS AT SEA WORLD!

Someone at my school made that up.

How was that?

[-b|ind-]

that as pretty good man. the reason you didn't get my other joke was probley you don't watch that much news, but anywase everyone that shoots and kills someone always says "i was just cleaning my gun when it accedentally went off".

[Half-White]

Oh now I get it.

[-b|ind-]

its called real news HAHA

[Asheron]

we interupt ur regularly scheduled program for a news bulliten tragic news stikes the keepler elf they have apperntly drowned in a tragic fudge acident makeing a new cookie

[-b|ind-]

HAHAH now thats funny

[Boom A]

Yeah I Agree Mad Joke

[Forsaken]

a guy gets pulled over for speeding by a traffic cop and is asked to get his license out, the man replies no
the copper asks why and the man replies
I got a gun in there
cop looks a little stunned and asks
why do u have a gun in the glovebox
I just shot my mother in law
where is she?
in the boot.
The copper says to the man just wait here a sec I'm going to call for backup
officer returns with some backup.
other officers says to the man, now let me get this straight, this officer tells me u got a gun in the glovebox and a body in the boot
man looks a little confused and says no... I bet he told you I was speeding as well.

a man took his beautiful pedigree Golden Retriever into the vet and asked the vet to chop his tail off
the vet replies with a swift no! I will not cut this dogs tail off
the man says it's extremely important that he did
the vet said mate unless u can give me an excellent reason why I should cut this dog's tail off I aint doing it.
man replies my mother in law is coming over and I want to make sure nobody looks happy to see her

[Boom A]

HAHAHAHAHAHA

[Asheron]

A young man is coming home from a night-club with a lady for the first time. He's never had *** before and knows nothing about "these things". The lady said to him "Just relax, I'm gonna do what is called a 69'er". This sounds okay so he tries it out. A few seconds into it the lady rips off the hugest fart, as she was about to apologise, the young man gets up and says "Stuff this, I can't handle another 68 of those!"

[-b|ind-]

ahahhahahahahah!HH!H!AHHAHAHHHAHHAH! good ones guys! we need more comedy here more often. O yeah forsaken i sent you a pm of the site with my avatar.

[Asheron]

A guy goes to the doctor with a problem. It seems that every time he farted, it sounded like "H - o - n - d - a- a- a!" The doctor examined him and found nothing wrong so he sent the patient home. The next day, the doctor thought "Honda. That's a Japanese car. Maybe this is a Japanese disease." He put in a long distance call to Tokyo and talked to a Japanese doctor who immefiately asked him if he had checked the patient's teeth. The American doctor hadn't so he thanked the Japanese doctor and ended the call. Then he called his patient and asked him to come in. Sure enough, he found an absessed tooth. He sent the patient to a dentist who cured the tooth and, at the same time, cured the farting problem. The American doctor called the Japanese doctor again and asked him how he was able to diagnose the problem so quickly. "Simple," said the Japanese doctor"absess makes the fart go Honda!"

[Half-White]

*dumb-blonde joke*

Three blondes walked into a bar. You'd think one of them would've seen it.

That's all I could think of...

[Asheron]

theres 2000 computers lined up side by side how do u tell wich one a blond was on, its the only one with wite out all over the screen

[Asheron]

or an even better one your mamma is so poor she dj's for the ice cream truck hahahahahahaha

[-b|ind-]

HAHAH

[Asheron]

c'mon people post here lets try to keep this thread alive

[Half-White]

another mama joke...

YOUR MAMA'S SO FAT, PRETTY SOON SHE'LL NEED HER OWN ZIPCODE!

Was that any good?

[Asheron]

haha dude that was great
your mamma is so fat i walk around her and get lost...
your mamma is so fat she sat on a rainbow and a skittle poped out

[Boom A]

HAHAHAHAHAHA Where do you get these Jokes Fighter Pilot:)

[Half-White]

That was awesome, Fighterpilot!

"If *** is a pain in the ass, you're doing it wrong."

Saw that in a magazine once...

Saw this one in Nintendo Power magazine..

*Mario and Sonic are in a group photo with the NP Crew.*

The caption reads: "Who are the dorks with Mario and Sonic?

[Asheron]

why do blonds women have bursits around the belly button cause blond men arnt smart either

[-b|ind-]

more i say more!!!!!!!

[Boom A]

I Second That
YEAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!:sungl:

[Asheron]

from who?

[cHilli]

Your so fat when you, were young your mother had to feed you with a slingshot.

in fact if I had a face like yours, id sue my parents.

[Asheron]

your so fat u got to put a belt on with a booarang

[-b|ind-]

your mom is so fat when she did a back flip she kicked jesus in the face;)

[Asheron]

good one blind

[Asheron]

tell me hows this one
sorry for the double post but i just thought of this and its great
Why do woman fart after they urinate? answer: Because they can't shake it they blow dry it!

[-b|ind-]

HAHAHAH

[Asheron]

nice to hear from u b|ind must have missed ya though

[-b|ind-]

feels good to be back homie:)

[Asheron]

yeah yeah yeah yeah wazzup G comeing in from the hood bow wow wow yippe yo yippe yae j/k good job on ur mod spot b|ind

[Half-White]

Way to go.

[Asheron]

yeah he's the mod of this forum

[-b|ind-]

thanks w00t w00t

[cHilli]

Speaking of the MOD's of this forum, where's NightWolf.

[-b|ind-]

hes never here, but i am always here:)

[cHilli]

And always here you should stay, (except for a certain Fourth Fusion, remember that??)

[-b|ind-]

I have bad memory ahah

[cHilli]

doesnt matter, without Emore we canr advertise it.

[-b|ind-]

yeah i guess your right

[cHilli]

yeah, pity.

[Asheron]

i was'nt paying attention what is sunch a pity?

[-b|ind-]

you can read back in the thread, its called review;)

[Asheron]

yeah well im to lazy

[-b|ind-]

ahahah to much clicking for you?

[Neo]

The american army and geronimo, go out hunting buffulo..

They travel for miles, when sudenly geronimo gets off his houre put his ear to the floor and says "huum Buffulo come"

The Commander Gets off his houres in shock of geronimos abbillity 2 tell if bufful are comming, and says "thats amazing how can you tell?"

Geronimo then gets up and carmly says "ear sticky".

[Asheron]

i dont get it

[Neo]

buffulo come insted of (siemen) ear sticky from the (siemen)

[-b|ind-]

AHAHAHHAHH LOL ROFL!!!!!!!!!!

[Boom A]

Really

[cHilli]

.........ive heard that before on this site..

[Half-White]

That's pretty good Neo. I always thought it meant buffalo crud...

[-b|ind-]

its kinda weird i never actually see neo make a joke or joke around hes too serious.

[cHilli]

Yeah, strange eh? I was talking (PM'ing) him and he said LOL after a sentince, SHOCKED I WAS , SHOCKED

[-b|ind-]

I never even seen him use lol.

[cHilli]

It's true, NEO HAS A SENCE OF HUMOUR, clear as mud i say, ...CLEAR...AS...MUD

[-b|ind-]

when though?

[Neo]

what you want proof? said once in a pm...

but i did some tracking down for ya, it was just b4 the pune we did on all the boards.

http://www.cheatingdome.com/forums/showthread.php?postid=3702#post3702



see

[-b|ind-]

wow i am so proud of neo=P

[Solidus Snake]

You guy's haven't known Neo that long have you? He's a real comedian. Cracks me up all the time. He's the next Steve Martin(or any other good funny man you can think of).;)

~SS

[Half-White]

It's just LOL you know, why would you be shocked? That's still pretty funny though.:P

[-b|ind-]

the reason I am shocked is that hes always to serious, this board was ment for fun not work!!!!!!!!!!

[Neo]

i take it no1 noticed the date on that post that i showed you?

go back and have a look you'll find it funny.

[Half-White]

The date's 7-21-2001....so?:confused:

[Asheron]

what are u talking about im to lazy to review back

[Neo]

the joke was that it was almost a year ago that i last said lol in a post.



do i realy have 2 explain all the jokes?

come on where's the whit?

[Half-White]

Well, that isn't too funny, not really..

But you almost got 2000 posts, that's cool.;)

[-b|ind-]

don't worry neo I thought i was funny

[Drakan Master]

Neo, that joke was stupid. I agree with XT960.

[Half-White]

Maybe Neo just has a very broad sense of humor...

[-b|ind-]

I have a feeling this guy Draken is going to cause some trouble.

[Boom A]

Yep

[-b|ind-]

god job boom a you past me.

[Half-White]

I've been here longer than both of you (Boom A and Blind), but I'm way behind you! How sad...:+

[-b|ind-]

well you don't spam like me and boom :)

[Half-White]

YOU TWO SPAM?! TO HELL WITH BOTH OF YOU, I SAY!!

jk;)

[Night Wolf]

i think it is stupid that u both spam why dont u to just right out proper messages u will get there soon then

[Boom A]

I Spam A little bit but not all the time and Dayle has Warned me so i'm not spamming anymore because its cheating and i shouldnt be cheating because it will be unfair to anyone else

[cHilli]

True, BA, true..
No More Spamming Plz. Thankin You.

Aswell if we dont get on the point im gonna have to close thread cause it my job'n all ;)

[Night Wolf]

look me and cillianok r the moderaters of this forum (discusion) so please dont spam in it other wise we wont be happy and we will tell neo

[Half-White]

In an attempt to get back on topic..

*a robber pulls Crocodile Dundee into an empty alley. He threatens Dundee with a pocketknife.*

Robber- Give me all your money!

Robber's girlfriend- Give him all your money! He has a knife!

Dundee- That's no knife. (He takes out a machete.) Now this is a knife.

*robber runs away*

[-b|ind-]

wtf nightwolf, I am still mod of this forum too ok, ever sence you came its all about you and cillianok, well I am still here thats why my name is at the top.

[cHilli]

No1: Now XT, thats a joke;) aw God, good one..

No2: @ blind, how's it about me and NW?

[-b|ind-]

cause it seems you guys have little mettings together, and leave me out of them.

[cHilli]

meetings? Blind, what ever your smoking, Its bad for you.;)

[Zephyranthes]

i would have meetings but no ones moding the Anime forum with me:cry:

[cHilli]

Coz you dont need any1 else;)

[Zephyranthes]

nah...i think i could use some help........

[-b|ind-]

@ cillianok, black n milds

[Unrealdimensions]

if i was a mod i would help you bryceman, thats basically what i post in any way, and cillanok sorry for posting your name wrong in a diff post.

[Unrealdimensions]

and that one sry

[Asheron]

The Vain Person
One who loves the smell of his own farts.

The Amiable Person
One who loves the smell of other people's farts.

The Proud Person
One who thinks his farts are exceptionable fine.

The Shy Person
One who releases silent farts then blushes.

The Imprudent Person
One who boldly farts out loud, and then laughs.

The Unfortunate Person
One who tries hard to fart, but ****s instead.

The Scientific Person
One who farts frequently, but is truly concerned for the environment.

The Nervous Person
One who stops in the middle of a fart.

The Honest Person
One who admitted he farted, but offers a good medical reason.

The Dishonest Person
One who farts but blames the dog.

The Foolish Person
One who suppresses a fart for hours and hours.

The Thrifty Person
One who always has several farts in reserve.

The Anti-Social Person
One who excuses himself and farts in complete privacy.

The Strategic Person
One who conceals his farts with loud coughing.

The Sadistic Person
One who farts in bed and then fluffs the covers over his bedmate.

The Intelligent Person
One who can determine from the smell of his neighbor's fart, precisely the latest food items consumed.

[Unrealdimensions]

oh man thats funny stuff im like so many of the ppl up there

[-b|ind-]

Hey FIGHTER where have you been, I haven't seen you in a long time.

[Half-White]

Now that was funny, Pilot. Did you think that up yourself?

[Unrealdimensions]

yeah i think im one of the sadistic kind

[Asheron]

my internet has been down but its back up have'nt u seen my thread in the mod talk?

[Unrealdimensions]

you guyz have your own thread in the private rooms, i thought those would be like chat roomslearn somthin new everyday, you just gotta notice it

[-b|ind-]

Nah I don't really like the mod talk, its kinda boaring. Hey FIGHTER, IM me back when I IM you aights?

[Asheron]

dude most of the times u im me im not there but today i just got u right when u loged off

[-b|ind-]

yeah well I was on again at 3:23 pm and once again you never wrote back.

[Unrealdimensions]

you guyz should go into the irc chat room then you could talk

[Asheron]

i go in there sometimes but no 1 is in it so i just quit going it all together

[Unrealdimensions]

i know ive benn in them to but i was always the only one in there

[Asheron]

yeah it got so boreing i starting talking to myself

[Unrealdimensions]

sounds like my bird shes always talking to her self

[Half-White]

My brother talks to himself when no one's around..

[Unrealdimensions]

lol,.... if he does it when nobodys around how do you know he does?

[Half-White]

Well, when nobody's in the room, he does..

For example, I'll be in my room, he'll be watching TV, and when something funny happens, he'll talk to himself, and I hear him..

Also, he used to talk to himself when he would take a $hIt..

[Unrealdimensions]

deliberating........... interesting i read well im on the john..lol

[CenturionZ_1]

Can anybody sat on topic for 3 posts?

[Unrealdimensions]

no its its in human nature to talk, but not all about one thing...lol

[Half-White]

Yeah, life would be boring if we never changed the subject every now and then. Oh wait, life is boring already, for the most part. Oh well.

[Unrealdimensions]

lol yeah but what if everybody was the same? thats be evan more boring

[CenturionZ_1]

Sorry for ever speaking.

God...

[Unrealdimensions]

sorry im just a good debator

[Half-White]

Did we make you mad? Sorry.

[Unrealdimensions]

yeah sorry

[Night Wolf]

i am really sorry about his but i wont be on for a while because my brother broke my computer so i have got to send it away and they sead i wont have it back for about 6-8weeks so please do not demod me i will back on has soon has i get my canputer back

[-b|ind-]

I have to get my new comp fixed up so i need to take more then about 2 weeks away sorry.

[Unrealdimensions]

well that sucks it seems were having an epidimick

[Tyger]

your mum so dumb she cant even tell the difference between you and the neighbors dog