| Achievement | How to unlock
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| 500 Slays of Bummer | Get 500 lifetime Critter kills.
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| A Cut Above | Beat the Buzzsaw Hate Bot.
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| Adequately Lubricated | Dunk your first Critter in oil, and have fun doing it!
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| Bada Bing Bada Boom | Beat the Timebomb Hate Bot.
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| Conflagration Sensation | Get 40 fires going simultaneously.
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| Decline Intervention | Get 250 lifetime Critter kills.
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| Die Centennial | Get 100 lifetime Critter kills.
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| Everyone Hates This One | Save all Critters in Gone With The Wind in 45 seconds.
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| Failed At Life, Okay At Death | Reach 30 lifetime level restarts.
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| I Am Shocked, Shocked | Beat the Zapper Hate Bot.
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| I Demand A Recount | Save more than three Critters in Six Enter - Three Leave.
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| I Want My Money Back | Beat the game.
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| Ingenuity | Find two different ways to set off the Oil Drum in Despair Mail.
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| Insta-Skill | Have every Critter (at least two) in the level die within a one second timespan.
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| Lickety Split | Get a perfect score on Split Second.
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| Low Flyer | Beat Hang Time without the Critter leaving the screen.
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| Medium Well | Save a Critter that has been char-broiled red.
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| Obsessive Compassion Disorder | Get a perfect score on every level in the game.
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| Paint The Town Red | Get blood on every solid object in a level.
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| Rescue Rager | Get your first Critter into the Elevator.
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| Self-Inflicted Wounds | Beat the Drill Hate Bot.
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| Training Wheels Off | Get a perfect score on every level in Stage 1.
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| Viva Variety | Kill Critters by all available methods: falling, spikes, buzzsaws, explosions, fire, and electricity.
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| We Don't Need No Water... | Beat the Flamethrower Hate Bot.
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