| Achievement | How to unlock
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| BURN, BURN, BURN! | Burn multiple paper people at once using gasoline.
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| For Science | Let all of the paper people burn in the furnace for one round.
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| Peace and Positivity | Reach a perfect score of 100% in Happiness and Productivity.
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| Specimen Collector 1 | Collect your first paper person.
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| Specimen Collector 10 | Collect 10 paper people.
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| Specimen Collector 100 | Collect 100 paper people.
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| Specimen Collector 1000 | Collect 1000 paper people.
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| We Get It, You Vape | Smoke a blunt while a paper person is looking at you.
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